Don't Give Up..

Althought things at this point can be confusing and complicated.. dont give up.. ive been telling myself that for the past few days/weeks.. emotions churning within.. frustration hits.. anger builds.. but my tolerance is still holding me into place.. and i know if i give up.. its the end.. the end of what we both thought could be again..

your still here.. thats what matters.. and time can only tell where we both are headed.. and i know deep within that time wants us to walk together.. even tho were far apart.. or close together..

its hard when one wants and the other one doesnt.. and only time will make one agree with the other.. the hope.. the possibilties.. the memories.. dont let me doubt the thought of being with you..

you said u let go.. i said i havent and will always hold on..
you said u dont love me.. i said that i still love you and always will..
you said u cant go on anymore.. i said that we both can go on if we have each other..
you said ure leaving.. i said that im going with you..
you said u dun wanna go through this anymore.. i said that we aren't going thru it.. we've been thru it..
you said that it hurts to be with me.. i said it hurts to be without you..
you said that ure happy without me.. but deep down inside u.. ure not.. and i said im not happy without u..
you told me to give it all up.. and i told u im never going to..

love is all around you..

coz i feel it in my fingers.. i feel it in my toes.. blah blah blah.. YaY.. i dont know why i feel so cheerful and gay today.. but somehow.. i find that feeling cheerful and gay.. really makes my day.. actually i have ntg to write about.. forgive me for my non inspiring post.. its really just a reflection of just how i feel.. i gotta go.. EAT CHOW!

Back in the Time...

ahhh gee.. i miss the old days where nothing used to matter.. no worries.. no stress.. when we were little weeners so to speak.. everything was just laid out for u at the table.. sometimes life forces you to change even when u dont want to... its what they call inevitable.. some people mature faster.. some people mature slower.. only life situations can determine it.. but i've learnt alot during my teen years.. its my last teen year and so far the last teen year is the worst when u go thru all this hormonal changes.. new workplaces/colleges.. have all your close frens leaving.. and u are not actually say forced to go out there and find new frens, its just that u dont wanna feel left out.. am i right? i may be wrong so correct me if i am..

Past 2 weeks again have been really terrible for me.. i just really dont know why.. things havent been the way it was for me.. i've been happier thats all i can say.. altho at times life pulls u down.. u always have good frens who come back at the right time.. they slap u and u wake up and see the real big picture.. not only to look at it from one perspective but at many different points.. simes back so i not only got company.. i gets lots of bum sex.. sorry zian.. ure missing out.. LoLs.. joking around.. i miss u zian.. really enjoyed ure company while u were here.. now look who's got a new chick huh.. lols..

ahh phewwwyyyy im bored..

Q. Why is it called a Wonder Bra?
A. When she takes it off, you wonder where her tits went.

Q. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
A. They don't have time.

Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?
A. They don't stop for directions.

Q. How do you make five pounds of fat look good?
A. Give it a nipple.

Q. What did Adam say to Eve?
A. Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets!

Q. How do you know when you are getting old?
A. When you start having dry dreams and wet farts

Q. What do Disney World & Viagra have in common?
A. They both make you wait an hour for a two minute ride.

Q. Why don't witches wear panties when flying on their broomsticks?
A. Better traction.

Q. Who can make more money in a week, a drug dealer or a prostitute?
A. The prostitute because she can wash and resell her crack.

Q. Why do bunnies have soft sex?
A. They have cotton balls

Q. How many newspapers can a woman hold between her legs?
A. One Post, two Globes, and many Times.

Q. Why do female skydivers wear jock straps?
A. So they don't whistle on the way down.

Q. What do women and police cars have in common?
A. They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming.

Q. Why is a woman's pussy like a warm toilet seat?
A. They both feel good, but you wonder who was there before you.

Q. What is the first sign of AIDS?
A. A pounding sensation in the ass.

Q. What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
A. Gagged

Q. What is the Difference Between Pussy and Apple Pie?
A. You can eat your mom's apple pie.

surprise...

Sorry i haven't been updating lately.. its been a while.. i felt like i din even have a blog anymore.. but deep down inside i knew i had one but i was just maybe i couldn't be bothered after such a long time or just plain lazy..

anyways.. in the last 2 weeks was really a rough time fer me.. went thru so much turbulence in my life it shook me hard.. so hard that i fell down and i thought i couldn't get up again.. but i was wrong.. positive thinking was important for me.. without it, i would of just been lost..

i needed some motivation to get thru those 2 weeks.. so i booked myself a flight to KL.. things turned out even better for me over there.. see frens.... my queen was so surprised to see me.. i showed up not knowing what she would do to me or say to me coz she didn't know i was coming.. but with the help of her room mate.. everything went according to planned and the surprise was succesful.. her face was priceless.. she was like stunned so badly.. it was just worth seeing her in that state.. it meant alot to me even tho sheila had her finals.. she still came down to subang with me.. i could feel her need to study so badly but she took the liberty of coming down with me anyway.. n i love her fer that..

we took at KTM down to subang jaya station.. and sime picked me up from there.. it was almost around 9pm and my friday was almost gone.. but the night was still young.. was so happy to see sime after such a long time.. he's been like a primary 6 fren till now.. and he's always been there for me.. so after he picked sheila and me up.. we went to pick wun chiang whom i see everytime in kch.. lols.. and we went to long kai? kai long? kong lai? i still cant remember that place still, for dinner.. clet and denise met up with us.. lols.. still the same since they left kuching.. but they had to go back after meeting up at long kai.. kai long.. kong lai??

after dinner we were deciding where to go.. the two lovely ladies whom i met at damai/rainforest.. jessie and wee yen.. met us at mentari court.. where ing haw and chiang stays.. thats where we waited and decided where to go for like 2 to almost 3 hours.. its either.. foosball and pool or clubbing.. after much indecisive making we finally decided to go clubbing at Q bar.. i think thats how ya spell it.. and off we went.. sime and chiang didn't join us.. but they went to asia cafe.. to play pool with Jack..

we bought a bottle at Q bar.. and after like 2 - 3 drinks.. the music stopped.. people started leaving.. i was blur.. seriously.. then wee yen ran out.. ditched us totally HAHA.. sheila was so worried like a little girl.. whispering to me that she didn't have her IC.. once one guy who came in to ask fer the IC.. we quickly went out.. ing haw took the bottle and ran somewhere.. jessie went back in to get her bag.. sheila and i was like totally ??? long story short.. we decided to go asia cafe to meet up with sime..Jack and chiang.. played pool abit.. and next thing i know were at "My Place" where Jack stays somewhere around the playground.. listening to Music.. singing.. and sheila was trying to study.. i felt bad honestly.. after the playground we all went back home.. sheila and i stayed at sime's place.. which was high tech man.. security pin code door lock.. security camera's.. gawd.. but the place was cool.. had astro.. so i watched football till 6am while sheila studied.. sime slept straight away..

next day was rather similar.. sheila had to go back to nilai at around 1 coz she had a stats paper to sit for at 4pm.. we we woke up rather early to send sheila to the KTM.. and from there.. i think we picked up Jack and we went to Sunway to have kebab.. MMmmm.. and walked around talked.. and we went to drink at umm.. kim gary's.. clet and denise met up with us again.. but for a short while.. then we went back to sime's place again.. there jessie and ing haw met up with us.. wa.. such a long story leh..

sheila came down again around almost 10pm.. picked everyone else up and we went down to KL.. woOOooo.. thanks sime for the drive.. meant alot to us.. we wanted to go Passion but in the end we somehow ended up in Nouvo.. which was not bad at all.. bought a bottle.. drank and danced whole night long.. somehow i just din feel right coz.. sime wasn't dancing.. tried getting him to have fun.. but it was like pulling a whale to the sand.. chiang had slippers.. that was his excuse for not dancing.. the rest ing haw.. jack.. wee yen.. jessie.. oh and another 2 new frens who joined us.. joanne and stanley.. were all dancing like there was no tomoro.. not to forget sheila.. danced like a pussy cat doll man.. should of seen her.. wild pussy cat.. (*)_(*) we were all drenched with sweat.. and it was time to leave.. simon was our better man.. and he drove the few of us back safely.. without him.. we wouldn't of able to have that kinda of fun.. sime was the heart and soul that night..

i wanted to hit the bed badly but sheila told me u shouldn't waste ure time here on sleep.. so i decided to join them for some after party kinda thing.. at jack's place.. wee yen and joanne left early coz joanne had to study.. i was lying down on the mattress the whole time.. while sheila.. jack.. haw.. stan.. and jess were talking.. talked about dunno wad till almost 6am then finally jessie said les go eat.. we all went for breakfast at some indian place.. gawd.. they ordered a buffet there.. i was a half dead zombie.. after breakfast it was about 8.30 and we said our goodbyes to inggie.. jessie.. and stan.... and my queen and i walked back to simes place which wasnt so far.. got there and we both slept like pigs..

1pm.. it was time for me to go back.. and sime dropped sheila and i off at the KTM.. was so sad leaving sime..meant everything to me.. thanks sime.. and went to KL central... my flight was at 3.25pm and it was almost 2pm when i reached KL central.. so sheila decided i should take the express down to KLIA and take a shuttle or taxi to LCCT.. said our lovely goodbyes to each other again.. and off i went to the express alone.. i was in time for my flight.. i really thought i was gonna miss it.. but damn.. i didnt.. that was my trip.. which i could of written shortly but since i haven't updated my blog for so long.. i'll put it in detail.. pictures ill upload when i get them from jess..

Long distance is a bitch

(Quoted by Kedung Bulan Rachel)

Yah lor.. LD i like to call it is really a bitch lor.. u know the female dog.. ahh nvm... for some people.. long distance may feel like the end of the world loh.. and for some it would feel like a challenge/test for the couple lor.. not easy ah.. but must try la.. love mah.. wad to do..

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder lor.. hoh.. really ah.. my heart ache leh.. growing too stale already.. no la.. haha jus kidding la.. sheila still in my heart la.. hee hee..sometimes going to the airport the most saddest part lor.. where u have to leave him or her.. and say goodbye.. kiss kiss.. slap lorh if not happy.. and when they go in u feel some part of u leaving into the terminal as well lorh.. like she/he pull and drag ure heart on the floor with her/him lorh.. if not happy with them going.. hopefully can bypass security into the loading bay and throw sai(shit) at the aeroplane lorh.. hope the pilot stop the whole flight because got sai(shit) on his window and cannot take off lorh..

not easy la.. not easy.. after a few months of "heeloO.. GooD mornings! how was ure day.. mine was fine tq.. no i did not look at this girl/guy.. bla bla bla bla bla bla.."

ure convo would end up like "helo.. ... ... ... oh ok.. bye"

total change in communication lorh.. no more.. "yeahh. i love u.. bye.. muaks.. gnites.. think of me.. dream of me..i'll dream of you.."

well.. if u want a LD relationships to work.. 2 must work together.. not leave the other hanging while the other has all the fun.. u 2 are in this together.. most importantly be there when they need u the most.. one thing ive learned is not to be too clingy as in like dun call 24/7 and msg 500 sms a day lorh.. it'll not only like bother her/him like hell.. it would also cost u a bomb.. so in fact.. msg when u really need to.. restrain ureself from calling.. hold ureself back!! if u can.. if not.. call la.. call some more..

Give words of encouragement to each other.. assure each other there's no one else in their minds.. but.. but each other.. don like go.. saying hey.. "im cheating on you.. WOO HOO.." F- ah.. life's a bitch as well if that happens.. and like when got smth going on.. and ure other half calls.. don go.. "Eh eh.. busy la.. bye.." talk nicely lorh.. say.. "sorry love/dear/honey/piggy/boo boo/mr malaysia.. im quite busy now.. can u call back later.. or ill get back to u.. ok.. bye.. muaks" (*) A+ Long distance is mainly about communication lorh.. no communication means.. an empty relationship lorh.. just like marriage lorh.. how can u not talk to ure wife or husband day by day.. its just not right lorh..

but sometimes i wait and wait.. and suffer the agony of waiting each moment to pass.. still no call or msg.. i feel like GRrRrrrR.. insecurity seeps in.. deep.. ure head cannot stop thinking lorh.. u need to help ure other half clear the doubts and insecurities.. thru talking (C O M M U N I C A T I O N) hearing each others voice can be soothing as well..soothing to the ears and helps relax the muscles.. and since if ure feeling down or unhappy.. they not there for physical bonding lor.. no hugs.. no kisses.. so communication couples.. comfort them.. do not declare Cold war lorh.. if u do. heart very cold and empty in the end lorh.. until one apologizes first lorh..

it'll be a plus if u had a webcam and mic lorh.. personally u all going thru LD should use skype.. if not.. msn will do la.. and if somehow cannot remember face anymore.. can see each other lorh.. mic is so that no need to buy reload day by day lorh.. or every once in 3 - 4 days lorh and see ure phone bill like paying car loan like that.... but in my case.. my boo boo in Nilai.. so connection slow like turle la.. can see each other on skype but then.. dc every minute one.. cannot lorh.. mic when u talk.. u say hi.. it sounds like byee.. coz lag too much.. cannot lorh.. wad to do.. LD is a bitch lorh..

but i salute all who's going thru Long Distance relationships.. and i wish u all the best to you and your other half.. i hope this post very informative lor.. make u know how the other half feeling lor.. so chiaoo..

untitled..

times change... everything changes.. sometimes things just dun turn out the way u want them to be.. its inevitable.. people change and there's no stopping that.. i feel like there's nth i could do to stop the things i wanted from leaving me.. from turning into memories.. and whats left is just me in a cold empty state.. i would just wonder what it would be like if everything i wanted was right in front of me.. would i be like this.. would i still be that sherman that everyone knows.. but it seems like everything i wanted doesnt seem to stay with me.. i seem to lose them when the time comes.. and the thing is that.. i find that people who leave change.. i still remain the same.. in my same old state.. while everyone has another life to live elsewhere.. i continue on with the one i've always had.. just with loved ones gone.. in a different country.. diff state pursuing their dreams.. i feel like im the black sheep left behind.. falling backwards instead of moving forward.. sometimes i feel its not fair.. but what is fair..? a homeless child without food and clothes and anybody to feel love and warmth from.. i cant go on living and feeling like im in a useless state.. but guys/gals.. do appreciate what u have.. sometimes i know i dun appreciate my parents enough for what they've done for me.. for what they've given me.. but i treasure it.. coz once reailty comes and there not here anymore.. it hits u.. i don get enough appreciation from a particular someone.. im not saying who.. but it's painful when u dun feel appreciated.. sometimes saying a simple i love u.. can just light up anyones day.. i know it lights up mine.. so remember.. appreciation can come from a simple thank you.. i love u.. or just that memorable smile.. make the change for the better.. not for the worse..

what i love doing..

Everytime.. i get down.. depressed.. or whenever i need to clear my mind.. i go do what i love doing.. i go have fun.. kicking footballs.. while the the wind blows in my face when im running.. it keeps me in a adrenaline rush.. when u score that goal that helps ure team wins.. when u defend and block balls from going into ure own goal.. as they say.. a good defense is a good offense...

guess who gave me that ball =D

now ya see it.. now ya dont..

i gotta run..

The sad part~

After we all came back to kuching.. we had hainanese chicken rice.. thanks care.. so sweet of ya.. treating all of us.. after eating we went straight to the airport.. ta see care off.. sad sad leaving everybody.. after the send off we went home.. then it was time for sheila to leave.. sobs.. sent her to the airport.. =(

ChEeSe~

Takin pIcs at The AirPoRt~

babes.. i hate it when u leave me.. its damn saddenning..

hates it.. i go.. i leave.. u come u leave.. why not.. i go.. u leave.. u come.. i leave.. GRRR..

sad leaving u all the time..

loving u always..

missing u here always..

this is not goodbye~

GIE GIE~ dang.. a pussy fren whom i just met like a few weeks ago.. HAHA sorry gie.. referring to u as a pussy fren.. u should understand.. well.. its been fun... it wasn't a sausage fest when u were around that fer sure.. make sure u send me a package back from perlis.. =D take cares.. and break a leg..

well.. so much has changed.. wait.. actually not much has changed.. its just that ppl come back and ppl go.. getting so used to this incoming and outcoming.. wells.. i wanna leave.. when is it my turn? guess it wont happen yet.. annzian gone.. angie gone.. kun seng's gone.. jason lim's back.. yay.. but boo as well.. he doesn't look fer me one.. chiang the face disfigurer is going soon.. but yay.. rainforest is coming up.. alotta ppl is back in kch =D

im at steve's.. and i was bored the whole afternoon i could actually see a spider make a complete web of its own.. it was amazing.. but i soon destroyed it after.. =D im mean.. all that effort..

its one of those days u just wanna sit and talk to someone.. like SHEILA.. but sheila's not here boo hoo.. lets not talk about her..

ahhhh.. superman.. he's damn handsome man.. gals.. u can watch superman just to see how good looking he is.. hahaha.. my goodness.. his hair is so fine.. and his face is.. owh.. he's my new favourite superhero.. i just need kryptonite near me so he doesnt take advantage of my ass.. and lois~ kekekeke..

LOOK at that face..

ok ok.. enough of superman.. monday.. tuesday.. wednesday.. thursday.. friday.. and YAY!!! VVIP coming backs.. aiyaa.. dont wanna talk bout her la.. :P

im so so so bored... anyways.. chiao for nows.. =D

im sitting here..

all alone.. well not alone.. annzian sleeping in my office.. wierd huh.. need to clean up my office.. grrRrrr.. messy.. im tired and feeling weak.. sheila's not here.. and im not getting enough sleep at night.. woke up like friggin early today coz i had to open my shop..

have u guys ever thought bout.. what if.. u had the right person in ure hands.. n u let them go coz for some reason.. and in the end u never got back with that person.. but she/he was the right one.. i always think of that.. always.. im scared of letting go.. coz id never know whether she will come back to me.. its always scary but.. since now when ure holding to someone u love.. dun let them go.. dun take them fer granted.. u might never get them back.. just a thought ppl~

every night b4 i sleep i roll around.. thinking and thinking.. thats what makes me cant sleep.. its gets me thinking so far.. and in the morning i wake up.. i couldnt remember a thing of what i thought about last night unless it was smth i really wanted to remember or do.. but i know i always think about sheila b4 i sleep.. the thought of her makes me calm and happy.. but some thoughts of her makes me insecure and worried.. GRahhHHh~

i need to make a phone call ppl~

ill blog bout smth interesting when i think of it... chiaos~

enTer the StaR~

Three times in one week we went to watch movies.. im as broke as one of the guys on broke back mountain.. lols.. jk.. but WooT.. burned a hole in my pocket even more.. we watched the omen on tuesday. benchwarmers on i forgot when.. and tokyo drift last night.. omen was a shitty movie for me in my opinion.. its actually a remake.. so its very expected what would happen.. benchwarmers was frigging lame.. but i laughed my ass off in that movie.. couldn't stop laughing.. tokyo drift.. well ull have to watch all the drifting ureself to say.. in my head i was wishing my car can do that.. but i know if i tried.. id might end up in some drain with my side sticking out.. or my car would be totalled(not a good thing.. no no no..) so i wouldnt wanna try if i were u kids.. i have a feeling were gonna go star again.. superman superman... but my feelings are always wrong.. soo good..

Saturday... what is there to do on saturday.. i know.. i wanna sleep tonight.. wad a good idea.. hope ill stick with it and not be tempted by frens to be pulled out from my house..

rainforest music festival is coming up.. woppiii dooo... smth to look forward to for all those who are going..

its already 2 pm..
got like another.. 6 more hours here.. longgggg..
helpppppp meeeeeee...
time for lunch..
mMMmmm.. yummmy tummmy bummyy..

im thinking of..

French fries... i dunno why but the craving is building up in me.. MmmmMMmmmm

need to ask my mummy to pay me back the money she owes or i wont get any french fries at all.. :(

ghhhhhhrahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhcias

i wanna wish Stevey a happy belated birthday.. and Pat as well a happy belated brithday.. sorry i wasnt around during ure bdays.. sheila's bday was also on that week so i had to sacrifice ure 2 bdays for her bday.. haha..

oh.. and i wanna say a very good goodbye.. to my simon Jihad.. denise.. Jack Black.. and Cletus.. who all went back to KL while i was still in KL.. ill hope to see u guys again.. simon defenitely..

im totally bored............................................................ operator.. the line is dead..............................................
is there anything better to do around here than just whine about how boring it is... hmmmzzzz...

FAST AND FURIOUS TOKYO DRIFT TONIGHT BABY!!! WoooooTT~

smth to look forward to at least.. so time will past faster.. faster!!!

sheila is a bum.. made me cant sleep last night..
mean words = hard time sleeping... loving words = sleep straight away.. remember the formula darlings..

Last night was my first time prawn fishing a place at kenyalang.. RM10 for an hour.. the more u catch the more worth it tho.... oh dang i dun haf any pics.. but it was fun.. seeing those prawns get stuck on ure hook.. too bad i only caught 2 minus 1 prawns coz jack made the second prawn i caught slip outta my hand.. i gave mine to arthur who was on a role.. kun seng caught a few.. annzian caught a few.. jack caught a few.. wun chiang.. AHHAHA.. he caught a dead BIG one thats all but had to throw it away.. if i do go there again id bring my cam..

wad a dream~

Just had a good dream.. usually id say.. i just had a wierd dream but this one's good.. it felt like hours of happiness.. hours of prolonged backaches at the mall.. and i did wake up with a backache.. lols.. but this dream is one i remember so clearly.. it all started with me flying off to KL to meet sheila.. here we go again.. lols.. and.. WooT was i glad to see her face.. it took me minutes to realise i was right next to her.. with my arms wrapped round her waist.. haha.. but it finally sank in and i knew it wasnt a dream.. it was so real..

her Campus was huge.. the size of central park.. from bormill estate near my place.. to around t1 area.... well.. maybe around that big la.. but crap even in my dream i had to walk.. usually i could fly..

we spent hours walking.. taking KTM.. Taking Bus.. using taxi's.. walking again.. but it was worthwhile just walking with someone of ure dreams..

it felt like we were in sunway pyramid and one U on the same day..

i even felt like we were in sunway lagoon fer a while.. felt like we swam for a minute and we got up..

i could remember our faces so clearly in my dream.. gosh~

one part of my dream.. it felt like she said fuck off to me.. i fell straight down a hole.. i kept falling.. and falling..

until i realized she was jus kidding around.. n the next thing i know i was surrounded by nando's chicken.. mmMmmm..

this is one dream id never forget.. never.. ever..

but the next thing i know.. i woke up.. and i see annzian.. sitting on a corner of his room?~!

i was like wtf? and that's when my dream ended.. freaky~

how long has it been?

a month and 2 days.. to some people it'll feel like a short time.. but to me it felt like time was torturing me.. slowly.. im so glad in just a weeks time i'll be with her.. my frens tell me why.. why is ure blog all about sheila.. its not easy forgetting someone u love so much.. imagine a year.. of seeing each other everyday without fail.. and suddenly she leaves on such a short notice.. it felt like smth inside u ripped apart.. she was my life for that whole year.. i've never been so much happier.. ^_^ im just so happy there's only a week left.. and i get ta see her.. so.. guys.. gals.. don take ure loved ones fer granted.. never do.. cherish every moment ya have.. once u get into this position.. ull feel much worse trust me.. people who are doing long distance would know wad im going thru.. ;) down to this ppl.. life makes sense only when u have found that reason fer living for.. ive thought about so much stuff.. and only now i realize.. there are so many reasons for living.. but this world isnt just all nice and cute.. it also has its cruel bitter sweet sides.. i never know.. things can change in a click of a finger.. hope for the best.. expect the worst..

looking forward to..

-going to KL in a few days time ta see sheila..
-finding stuff to to in KL with sheila..
-Rainforest in July..
-sheila comin back in July..
-going crazy at rainforest..
-sleep every night..
-going out with my frens..
-when i get my salary..
-get sheila back in kch for quite some time..
-doing smth like.. opening a business..
-getting myself a good nice sexy body.. lols..

gRAhh.. cant think of anything else actually.. im just really really bored.. i cant find anything else to do at night ere.. wells.. chatting nows.. buh bye..

My BaDdd~~

sorry i haven't been updating daily.. nth to writes about.. running out of things to write.. well.. the last few days have been somewhat a bore... but also somethin new.. went to watch poseidon a few days ago.. was quite a nice intense show.. but alot unrealstic events.. like them holding their breath for damn long and that kinda shit.. i've been hanging around bryan's place for the almost the whole of wesak day... saturday was my off day.. so i stayed at home the whole time and slept.. went t1 abit.. with jack.. Sunday today.. it's mothers day.. omg.. i really forgot to wish my mum happy mother's day.. i was getting ready fer work and as usual i was late already.. so it didnt come to my mind... instead of wishing my mum first.. i wished sheila's mum happy mother's day.. she was happy at least her son in law wished her first.. she told me sheila and dick haven't yet.. and zoe is still young.. LoLs.. kolien... but i told her not to worry.. coz i know sheila will wish her.. wells.. ntg's much lei.. bored in work.. wanna do smth... but nth to do... sheila in Nilai.. i think all my frens are pigs and still sleeping.. GrRrrR.. k.. chiIaoOo.. for any mother's who read my blog.. hApPy MotHer's Day.. enjoy a day with ure family..

right?~

hello again.. sighs... who's been extremely motivated lately? motivated to do ure work.. motivated to study.. if u are.. please tell me how u guys do it.. i need motivation.. everyday.. i go to the office.. oh no.. another day... another day.. where is my motivation..? she's gone.. nothing pushes me to wake up in the morning.. nothing pushes me to walk that extra mile.. i find that something is bothering me.. like a fly squimmering about... its somewhat annoying.. everytime i wake up being empty inside.. that emptyness every morning feels like its eating me up whole.. something that surprises me is that im still walking.. im still talking.. i thought that i would be too depressed once she left to even lift a finger.. but i was wrong... altho im going over to see her in a few weeks.. ok.. after that.. would i be happy? motivated to work harder and go over to see her again.. i dunno.. i really dunno.. i guess time will tell.. well.. sorry my blog is all boring and 90% bout this girl.. why is this girl so special.. sherman will u shut up bout this girl already.. well.. really becoz in the past year.. she's been filling my life with joy and happiness... life was meaningful... after she left, ok.. we both couldn't do anything bout it.. it was fate.. maybe God wants me to learn to be happy without her.. that's the thing... HOW?! well i will find out.. my goal is to find out.. i know t1 aint gonna make happy everyday and night.. lols.. its a past time.. ok.. enuf.. im filling my blog with rubbish.. Byee ppl..

I miSs~ / I HAtE! / I LoVe^

its been a normal routine fer me everyday just to go work in the morning.. and at night go to t1 kill time and try forget bout sheila.. but after t1.. that's where i start to feel.. sighs.. its not helping.. here are some things i miSs, haTe, And LovE~

I MiSS~~

* LodGe.. i dunno why.. but really Lodge is where i met most of the guys..
* siMes.. he's been a long time fren.. AlWays Ask me fer burgers.. GiVin me advice..
* PlAnEt.. our second home.. now its T1.. coz heNgky is GOne..
* Mr Lim and His MOustachE... how we always tease him bout shaving it...
* SheiLa Back Here.. always accompanying me when im bored.. my SouLmaTe... =D
* My LimkokWing Frens.. how we'd stay up late at night to do our assignments last min..
* ChiANg.. and his stupidity.. always gets me laughing..
* CaReY.. annzian anD I.. where we used to hangout and i having to find a way home..
* Where We Used to always Jam and damn it feels good..
* Pickin up sheIla.. whenever we both were free..
* Lookin For Stuff to do but in the end doing nth..
* fooTball In schooL.. running down after/during class just to get a goal..
* lots of frens who were from international..
* All The Guys and Gals wHo went overseas to study.. miss u guys alot..

I HaTe~

* i Hate Sheila so much sometimes i wanna pluck her eye ouT.. badly.. she forgot who the ferrero roChers were from when i gave it to her at the airport.. and she din even mention about me in her blog as much as i do.. LOL!
* Drivers who are damn pu Boh and like to Cut to My Lane...
* PonDans on the roAds..
* My bAd Connection sometimes..
* WakIn up damN earlY for nothing..
* It when Im BoRed..
* PpL who talk behind backs..
* It when peopLe fart and Dont say safety..
* SHeIla again for always not replyin me online fast enuf or dont even bother replying me..
* AnnZian when he's damn mooDy.. Stay aWAy..
* the Person who ScRatched the side of my car front to back.. hope ure car one day kenak bomb.
* Mdm ArMStROng.. for always talking shit to me..

I lOvE~

* SheIla When she's in a damn SUper gooD mood..
* my frens.. simes.. chiang.. sTeve.. Jack.. AnnZian.. BrYan h^nG.. LiONel.. BaRnEy OnG.. CAreY.. SeaN WonG.. BrAndOn SiA.. lIMKowiNg BuddIEs.. SiB FrenS.. EbC FrEns.. AnyONe i've MIssed Out.. i'm vEry SorRy..
* AnnzIAn when He's DamN geneRous..
* My faMIlY..
* My caR..
* Dota When im OWnIng..
* GoD..
* SheiLa MOst of all.. for her loVing Me so much...

And The list goes on...

as it is..

WOoO hoOOo.. back with connection again... cant say how happy i am to have connection at home again... its like whenever ure bored u go online.. when u got nth to do u go online.. when u wanna chat with ure someone u go online..

I took this picture in my car.. when i was with sheila.. it simply just catches my heart whenever i look at it.. it was at the simpang tiga traffic light.. reminds me of the memories when sheila was still here in kCh..
SomEtimes i wondered how life would be like without the person with ure with now.. it'll be so much different.. how different.. well.. ALOT! and i have no regrets or whatsoever being with the one and only.. QuEen ShEeRah.. life changes every time u make a decision.. decisions decisions.. it creates a path to something new.. somewhere new.. so even sometimes u take the wrong path.. nvm.. u learn from it.. and try not to walk that path again..

WeLLs.. as we all know life goes on.. obstacles will always block our path.. and we always find a way round it or over it.. jus remember to make the right decision in life and dont regret it..

Ever Had A Unforgettable Happy Moment?

Yeah everyone has a sad moment and a happy moment.. dont u wish u could stay in that happy moment all the time.. well i know it's not possible.. my only happy moment is when im with you sheila... its unforgettable and every moment with you is like smiles and laughter... and I know you cant be here by my side everyday.. it feels like time passes so slow.. yet i wait for that day that i can see you again.. seriously days feel like months, hours feel like days, minutes feel like hours... That hope for me to see you again is my motivation, that is what's keeping me going...